Friday, August 28, 2009

Epic Star Trek Design FAILs

John Scalzi has posted his Guide to Epic SciFi Design FAILs - Star Trek Edition. Not quite as funny as the SW one IMO, but worth perusing anyway.

Bad design, or awesome? Evidence for awesome: They can very precisely vaporize living creatures -- and their clothes! -- whilst leaving everything else (floors, walls, objects people are sitting on) untouched. Evidence for bad: Inconsistent power output. In Star Trek II, a phaser vaporizes a mind-controlling eel of Ceti Alpha V (also, the Starfleet officer it's inside of -- and his clothes!), but then turns another such eel into a smoky smear. Yes, one can dial down phaser power, but I'm pretty sure you can't actually set a phaser to "smudge."

You have your choice: Velouresque pajamas and miniskirts (resurrected for the 2009 reboot), burgundy jackets with puffy blouses (Treks II - VI), or progressively unflattering jumpsuits (Treks VII - X). Do Starfleet personnel ever stop what they're doing, look at each other, and ask, "Who dresses us?" They should. But all of the above are at least better than the eye-poking fashions of the first movie."


Barking Alien said...

Not nearly as good as his Star Wars list. Does this mean Star Trek has better designs?

Not sure but at least two are personal opinions on aesthetics
(Uniforms and the Borg) and one is questioning the visual effects of a device he himself declares to have variable effects. None of that has to do with design failure.

I'm a big Star Trek fan and can easily come up with waaay more jokes about treknology silliness. Maybe watch the movies again and brush up on the funny.

Barking Alien

Jerry Cornelius said...

Yeah, I don't get the impression he's much of a fan. Like some of the comments mention, how could he not poke fun at the lack of seat-belts?